SPOTTING FELLOW MEDIOCRES
I hope all, Mediocres and Supers alike, had a delightful Easter weekend. Holidays are fabulous, because Mediocres are not excluded from them.
I recognized recently that I’ve gone to great lengths to help Mediocres identify Supers when they’re out and about, yet have entirely neglected the easiest ways to spot our fellow Mediocres. Having this ability can assist us when we are in need of finding one of our own.
Below is a top nine list that I didn’t place much effort into compiling.
9) Nose picking in public. This falls almost exclusively to the male gender in Mediocres. No woman, Mediocre or Super, would consider picking her nose publicly. Most often this can be witnessed while you’re driving. Mediocre men, for whatever reason, believe that it’s mandatory to pick their nose while behind the wheel.
8 ) Women who buy their own flowers. Sometimes, sadly, delivered to them with the *self-flowering* method. Mediocre women usually only receive flowers as a gift if they’re *I’m sorry* flowers. And I’ll tell you, no woman wants *I’m sorry* flowers.
7) Parents/children who utilize the public school system. A Super parent rarely subjects their child to this public institution. When it does happen, it’s usually done by the parent to prepare their child for an adult world that would require the harnessing of Mediocres to propel themselves further in a career field. The variances in the two become more evident upon graduation when a child enrolls in either a community college or a university. Mediocre children most often begin their higher education at the community college level.
6) One hyphenated word. Wal-Mart.
5) Anyone who takes advantage of the opportunities available through their community resource/recreation center. Be it team sports, aerobics, swim lessons or foreign language classes; only Mediocres will take this avenue.
4) One acronym. NASCAR.
3) Google Plus users. Not many know this, but Mark Zuckerberg, himself a Super, sought a Mediocre cleansing of Facebook, and INITIATED the development of Google Plus to try and lure Mediocres elsewhere. The problem with his plan, Mediocres aren’t *in the know*, and had no knowledge of a new social platform. Believe it or not, there are some Mediocres who still use AOL. I know, I know; it’s shocking.
2) A handicapped individual who refuses to park in a handicap space. Because our country *claims* equality for all, it cannot discriminate against handicapped individuals. BUT, when a Mediocre receives a permit to park in a reserved spot, they receive additional instruction on how those spaces are meant for only handicapped Supers. Quite often you will see someone park in a handicap spot without the required permit. Those people are able bodied Supers, and are NEVER ticketed for this supposed violation. This is the dirty underside of government favoritism towards Supers.
1) And the number one way to spot a fellow Mediocre, anyone you see reading a Nicholas Sparks book. A Super would never lower themselves to read such dribble. The interesting twist on this, is that it’s perfectly acceptable in Super circles to see a movie based upon one of his books. This is something I am still analyzing. If I come to a conclusion, I will post on it.
I hope this list helps. And if there’s anything that any of you Mediocres can add, I would appreciate it. We’re surviving our destiny, one day at a time.